"I have a dream!"

Mr. Martin Luther isn't the only one who has a dream.
I'm having real trouble with my eye and head tilt this week.  Problem is I can't describe what is exactly going on. You know what? Sometimes, I don't have a clue what is going on.
I've been sick with a basic cold this week.  Plus my back is still hurting from dislocating this dumb joint in my pelvis.   I did that a good while ago.
I'm so very tired but then today as I sat at the Kingdom Hall eye was struggling and my heart was so goofy.  The rhythm was all over the place.  I asked my friend for her watch and timed it. It was 60 bpm then I felt it change it jumped to 82 p.b.m. I felt almost sick and that I needed to sleep. Yet I felt out of breath.  So I took the car, leaving Jimbo to find his own way home.  I slept for 45 min.  And felt better.  Then off to clean a business.

Since I had that scary episode with my veins popping out of my head all week, I've had renewed interest in what in the h e double hockey sticks is wrong with me.

"Beaker" 

I really wanted to go get help back when I had that killer headache where I really thought I was going to stroke. But I couldn't. Two times that week I really thought I may die. A person should go to the hospital when they really think they're going to die.  Not me.  I know how it goes.  They do all these tests and nothing shows up typical so they send you home with a huge bill and no more answers than when you went in.  Once they kept me for 3 nights and just let me go.  You shoulda heard what I told the Cardiologist I had at the time.  Ha!  I affectionately refer to him to this day as "beaker" He looked just like "beaker" from the  Muppets.  I laugh as I write this remembering how I grilled him about his knowledge of anti inflammatories and how they work.  You had to be there, but I was in a bad, bad mood being locked in for 3 days as they ran every crazy test on me.    Ha ha ha.  I was livid.  But just because you're called a "Doctor" doesn't mean that all Dr.'s are genius'.  This guy was an idiot.  I mean he had to know he sounded like an idiot.  I had distant friends visiting that day when "beaker" came in to discharge me.  They could vouch for what a geek he was. Unfortunately, that was one of the main experiences that make me never want to go to the hospital again.  Earlier this was the same Dr. who told me my aorta was rupturing when all it was, was a scar from the bypass machine.  BIG MISTAKE!

My dream is that I could walk into Mayo. Some department could look over everything, understand exactly what's happening and know exactly what the deali-o is and tell me how to live my life and when to be truly concerned.  I wish there was a place I could go or someone I could call that would know what is going on and not over react and scare me with talk of aortic rupture, lupus, lymphoma, etc.  (These are things I've heard before).  And how is it that you can go to med school for umpteen years and not know  one thing about connective tissue?  Huh??? If I had a nickle for every cock eyed look when I said Marfans, or Ehlers Danlos. I'd have many nickles!
Anyway, I have a dream.   :)